I actually just returned a medal to the man's family last month. I had the medal in my collection for over 13 years. It was a very valued piece in my collection - even written about extensively here on GMIC. And of course, as mentioned is possible, various members of the family while researching their ancestor, found the info on GMIC and contacted me through the forum. The first time was over 10 years ago. The first two family members shared info about the man and in closing always wrote, "If you ever choose to part with the medal..." Ten years ago, I felt as many here have stated; at some point, someone in the family, parted with the medal - for whatever reason - and I felt no obligation to return the medal. Especially after I found from the research of the man/medal, that it was a quite valuable collectible and worth considerably more than what I had paid. I even at one point was contacted by an author who was including the man in a book he was writing - and later published - and he wanted to obtain the medal. I declined. For the next ten years or so, I had no contact from anyone regarding the medal. Then in January, the man's great granddaughter contacted me via email. She related how her father and other family members had visited the man's grave at Sanders Keep for the 100th anniversary of his death in 1918 and how it had been an emotional experience for her father (the man's grandson). She wanted to know if I'd consider selling her the medal so she could give it to her father. My first thought was as it had been in the past; I did not want to sell the medal. But after pondering it a bit, I realized that it was just sitting in my drawer. Yes, I prized it - it had even continued to increase in monetary value over the past 10 years - but was I really "enjoying" it being in my collection? I truly enjoyed all the research I did on the man/medal/unit in the first years I owned the medal. But my collecting focus and research (and even interest in the hobby) has moved on and in different directions. The medal was just sitting in a drawer. So, I decided to sell - I didn't feel right quoting a price - I asked the woman to offer what she thought was fair and if I thought it was fair, I'd sell it to her. She made an almost spot on offer of what I thought was the fair market value of the medal. So, I sold it to her.
The bottom line, you have no obligation; there are several factors to consider and you have to do what is right for yourself as a collector. If you "value" the emotional satisfaction of gifting it to the family. Then do it. If you want to sell the item as a collectible with a negotiated price. Then do it. In the end for me, I decided that the medal was just sitting in a drawer; it no longer was a focus of research; it wasn't in my primary field of interest (that is it wasn't artillery). I was offered a fair price. I figure, I can turn that money into another "prized" piece - probably artillery related. Even if I sold it to another collector, there is no guarantee it would not "just sit in a drawer." So, if the family enjoys it for a short time and puts it in a drawer. That's their business. To me, it became a transaction like any other with just as if it were with another collector. And just maybe, the family will treasure the medal - and I have the satisfaction of knowing that I at least sold it to someone who might treasure the medal as much as I did when I owned it...